Because 2am baby party. It’s over now. But I’m 100% awake.
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Hi mate. We’re having a grumble sob fest over here. Why, babies, why. But if it’s both our kids, maybe it’s developmental?
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Oh yeah, babies suck. Actually I can’t fault the little guy. He came into the spare bed with me, blew bubbles and chatted for a bit. Then I ignored him and he went to sleep. I’m positive his older brother never did that. Always the holding and walking. Forever walking.
We might be between developmental leaps and bouts of illness?
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I was so hot I was sweaty, so I changed into fresh pajamas and put a new sheet down. Then I had to pee. Then I tried reading a bit, then fishing to a podcast, too hot again, then too cold, then something across the house made noise, couldn’t get comfortable, too hot/too cold again, I have to pee, I give up.
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Because my kid will take an hour or more to be tired, so I need to be strong
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4am baby party.
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Brain: let’s have a nightmare about a car accident and you can’t move to get out.
Me: oh crap this is an emergency MOVE BODY MOVE
Brain: look at that, you’re awake now! Excellent. We have a lot of work to do. Ehm, first on the list… That k drama you watched… Ok but what if ghosts actually exist and if you open your eyes you see a horrible bloody face leering at you?
Me: … What?
Brain: turns up the dial on FEAR OF THE DARK and STORIES I HEARD IN RELIGION CLASS
Me: ok ok ok I’ll swing my arms and then open my eyes and I think I also remember that prayer in Arabic I learned in elementary I hope the words are right? Does it still count if I miss a preposition? God knows right?
Brain: yes, yes very nice. For good measure let us remember all the details of every creepy ghost we’ve seen on tv–
Me: reaches for phone Ahhhh… Cryptocurrency cruise disasters. Hehehe blood diamonds. And – memes! – sweet, sweet ambrosia! Well, I’m tired, time for bed!
Brain: …
Me: …
Brain: gosh, I forgot how awesome our cat was. She’s the greatest isn’t she? A real superb cat
Me: yeah 
Brain: that guy in your nightmare was actually [redacted] from elementary school. Let’s revisit how deeply you humiliated yourself in front of him and his brother your entire childhood and young adult life! It would be so fun to run into them at one of your religious community events, right? Likely to happen. Gosh while we’re here let’s also think about your entire humiliating college experience and every embarrassing social gaffe and bombed presentation. OMG you remember that you had your first serious boyfriend hahahahahaha you were sooooo stupid in front of him and your friends
Me: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?
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So… Finding it hard to sleep?
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Yepppp
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Because I started what I thought would be a ~1 hour task and 6 hours later emerged from a haze of Excel scripting to realise it’s long past my bedtime
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Teeth.
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Two days ago my child woke up just before 5. Yesterday he woke up at 4:40. Last night we watched a movie so he went to bed a little later … This morning he was up at 4:30. Me. Meer tried to get him to let down for a bit longer but I don’t think that was successful from the sounds of it. WTF child, why do you hate sleep?
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2h+ of toddler nightmares, and then it was half an hour before my alarm, so I abandoned toddler and husboo, took a shower, packed my work bag and now I’ll adjust my alarm and sleep for an hour. Last night’s dishes may never get done. Diapers may need to rewash.
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I am writing letters in my head that I will never send to people I wronged or who have wronged me
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Because I dared to have two units of caffeine today and forgot about it when I was getting ready for bed so I didn’t take extra melatonin to make up for it. Now I’m at the “annoyed with everything” stage and Kiddo will probably be up and making noise in five hours. Sigh.
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Because Diablo was rereleased and my dog won’t settle until my husband comes to bed.
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Yep. He woke up at 4:50 yet again. Pushing his bedtime back does nothing. If we moved to a new timezone would he still wake up at the same time? Could a baby sleep consultant help or will they try to claim he’s not a baby? Will the things I wanted to do today just do themselves while I nap?
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This one goes up to 5 years…
https://www.seedandsew.org/sleep-courses
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Thank you. Really I just want someone to wave a magic wand, but I think the main problem is genetic with early rising grandparents. I think my dad has always woken up around 5 and my FIL is similar.
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Um ok because - W A I T F O R I T - ocd sometimes convinces you of crazy shit Descartes style.
Like, say, in a HYPOTHETICAL WORLD, you had a brain that tried to convince you that your perfectly healthy and breathing child was in fact not alive because he choked while you weren’t watching and maybe you’re having a mental break.
So hypothetically that would be why you’re doing everything in your power to not have some quiet moments and do anything to shake off that weird creeping dread on the edges of your brain because DUH you’re not CRAZY…
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