I was going to say something, and then it was just Pulp’s Common People
3 Likes
I still have a lot of really frugal spending practices I cling to, like buying nearly off produce (you can easily peel off outer layers or just saute stuff that’s already wilting) for $6 so I can afford to eat a wider variety of fruits and vegetables.
Some things that I want to upgrade I’ve owned since college which is between FIVE-NINE years ago. That is an extremely frugal and reasonable timeframe to replace something, it’s just that being a low earner I get stuck in “nothing I do will ever be good enough” traps because I’m still broke and will be for the next five years too before I really cross the threshold. I have tried very hard and to some extent actually relaxed recently on the guilt about replacements. I’m also nearing 28 years old and the things 28 year old working adults have are different than the things that 20 year old students have.
Summary
This has come up with old shoes, socks with holes, phone cases, coffee mugs with chipping paint, furniture items from past apartments that are too big or not right for my current studio, clothes that don’t fit right or are visibly worn down, old cookware with scratches. Guilt about buying a new spatula that’s getting crummy when it’s a freaking Ikea spatula that was probably $2-$3! Like, it is not a family heirloom LOL, obviously it’s not going to be The One True Spatula and I’ll never need another one again.
I also have a lot of guilt about my spending on sneakers and other walking shoes. I walk a lot which runs down my shoes like crazy to where there’s no tread left or actual holes through the foam. Like, these shoes are not even suitable to be donated to unhoused people when I’m done with them, it would be that offensive, so why am I as a person with income willing putting my self through what is frankly an embarrassing level of suffering. I’ve finally reached the point where I’m just buying the new sneakers every 6 months without angst.
^This kind of thing came up again when I realized I needed to decide if I was feeling like I needed to replace my wallet or just wanted to replace my wallet. It’s not a sleek or nice looking design (it’s brown with a pink wrist strap), it’s fine for everyday but not an item I love. It’s not even really a thing I bought, it came with a backpack I bought, so I swapped it in to replace the last worn down cheap wallet. I still don’t know if it’s a need or want, and it does still hold the money and cards without them falling out, but the glue is peeling and the fake leather is stripping off in some spots, so it’s not even in a condition to donate to a thrift store for resale. I am still having a lot of angst about it but I spent $35 on a real leather wallet that hopefully lasts a decade plus.
In conclusion I do not relax. But it does make me happy how sleek this looks, can’t wait until it ships!
Damn, sorry all of that was such a bummer
22 Likes
Not a bummer at all! It sounds like you’re in a challenging transition phase. I have an idea that may or may not work for you. It seems like you are able to tell if something is nice enough to donate or not, but struggle to tell if something is a need or not. Maybe that can be your barometer for checking if something is a need or not? Like, you can ask yourself “would I donate this?” and if the answer is no, then it’s ok for you to replace it. If you would donate it then it’s not a need to replace it.
13 Likes
I came across this thread via an article and some of the exchanges made me think of our conversation here.
Especially this poster’s absurd (in that it’s ridiculous it was needed) disclaimer:
How to be hungry. Not what it feels like to be hungry, but how to live your life even though you’re hungry all the time. Heh.
Edited to add (because somehow this is apparently necessary) that the chosen situation of being on a diet is not the same as being hungry and unable to afford to do anything about it.
17 Likes