I’ll start.
My stupid phone updated overnight, and now everything looks different. I’m of an age where I wish the Google, and the Facebook, and the phone would just stay the same!
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My battery on my phone has been shit lately.
Lil Pup’s guard barking has improved, but it’s still there and my patience is wearing thin- which is detrimental to the training 
I have work shit I don’t want to do. Since I’m technically still employed. 
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I have to work M-F this week, and tomorrow and Friday I have to sit at a desk that is not my own, and I dislike it.
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The worst! Sympathy.
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I must grade things and attend many stupid meetings.
Am working on Project Say What I Really Think in meetings in hope of being “invited” to fewer of them, so at least there’s some entertainment value there. Plus someone needs to point to the elephant in the room in most of these situations.
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I would like to register a tiny complaint that all my other complaints right now are not tiny. SIGH.
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I need to unpack my suitcase and do laundry and I Don’t Wanna. Worst part of travel.
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My green curry was brown, and also not pizza. If popcorn didn’t exist I’d be ruined
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My clean laundry from last week failed to fold itself and jump into our drawers. Now I have to put it away before I can start washing this week’s laundry. Why doesn’t it just do itself?!
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This always happens to me too!
It’s super rude of it.
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I have a college I love teaching at, but they are brutally slow with paying me. Booked the gig in July of last year. I spoke there, including flying there + staying there for 2 nights, in mid-January. Invoiced the day after…
Checks been “in the mail” for over a month now. I would really like to close out my books before I leave the country next week, plus I would like that couple thousand bucks they owe me, you know, soon…
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I have to peeeeeeeeeeee, but the porta jon is so far awayyyyyyyyyyyy and the seat will be so colllllllllllll.
Weep for me.
ETA: I peed. It was terrible.
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This has also been my experience with getting paid from a college in a contractor type position 
My classroom is cold and I can’t make it warmer.
I sneezed four times and feel a fifth one coming. Waiting for a sneeze is annoying.
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Slow paying clients are the woooooorst. My most regular client now pays me more often for 2 months at a time since they like to procrastinate. At least I’m now charging a late fee. But I really hate harassing them to pay their damn bill.
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I have Unbreak My Heart stuck in my head and I might actually literally die of it.
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My puppy keeps barking.
My smoke alarms went off when I was roasting green beans.
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Our apartment’s smoke detectors are so sensitive that they go off almost every time I open the oven while cooking. It makes fiancée really mad and we recently discussed taking them down and moving them to a different room for the sake of our sanity…
We have exactly the same problem. Can’t mske burgers either. There’s a solution! I recently learned about, and we’re waiting to be delivered. Basically there are these “dust covers” made for construction that are basically red shower caps designed to cover the detector so it won’t go off. I’ll put them on each time I cook something “risky” lol.
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