My kitchen bench is unfucked! It is now ONLY used for food prep. All the paper and random crap has been relocated (to the now fucked study nook, but that is the place I’ve decided will be in perpetual cycle of fuckery.)
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Yay, you! I have these goals.
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Unfucked some stuff that Wizard had let build up while I was away. Yay I have a kitchen floor again?!
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Got some help to unfuck my storage room after 12/18 month 
Friends moved 400 km away to the north and needed me and my ID to get the last stuff to the recycling / trash place before selling there old house is completed on Monday. (if you are not from the area, you are not allowed to get your trash there, they check addresses on ID).
I agreed, only condition we are taking my stuff as well, I planned for the last 18 month to do that.
Now my storage room is nice and orderly. 
After I helped them with some financial stuff as well, I was treated to a nice Turkish lunch. 
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How can I unfuck this table better? It never gets 100% cleared off, at best it’s 75% cleared off and we all just ignore the pile of stuff shoved to one side. The norm is 50-90% covered in crap (the yellow area). This is where Kiddo does homework but also does drawings (red circle). I created a paper basket for him to get paper out of with scrap paper but he never uses it and it gets buried pretty quick. There’s also partially done Kiwico boxes, some cardboard from a recent project, a lamp for some reason (it’s a perfectly good lamp but we don’t have a place for it right now and Mr. Meer wants to keep it … somewhere … no idea where though, we don’t have a “random household goods” spot in the house). Generally there’s just tons of random papers and drawings that are too new to toss (what if he asks about it and it’s already in the trash??) but that we don’t intend to keep long term.
I guess add storage somehow? Not sure what kind though.
(I think I deleted all identifying info but who knows)
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Put the lamp in the hall closet for the nonce.
I personally have a bookcase in the dining room with baskets for art supplies and projects, and a basket for junk mail and a basket for newspapers. I am the only person appears to care about the state of the dining room table (or any other table) and so we have established that I will be tossing things out every Sunday because the trash goes out that night and if you really need your paper you had better find a place for it. But I am cold and ruthless…
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In the back of the picture you can see a console table with a middle shelf thing (and yet more Kiwi boxes stacked up, those might even be empty and homeless?) Maybe I’ll get some baskets or something to put over there and that can be the home for things. Definitely Kiddo-accessible.
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If mr Meer wants to keep the lamp, then Mr Meer gets to figure out appropriate storage for the lamp 
Otherwise, I think it comes down to some sort of scheduled unfucking or a triggering event. Is the trigger- every night as closing duties? With kiddo before bed? The first time he can’t find a piece of paper he’s looking for?
And then yes, mid term storage! Maybe a wall mounted filing thing for his art, or a collapsible file pouch? Then purge when it’s full or end of school term?
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We have an assortment of kiwi crates under the coffee table and an even more annoying assortment of Yum boxes in the hall closet, so we are not immune to these issues!
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Oh, because this just happened, unfucking hack: have a thawing bin! We use one from ikea. A lot easier to dry than a ziplock, and prevents the whole drawer from getting messy if there’s a leak as something thaws. We put it inside our meat drawer, then any thawing meat for later goes in there. Way easier than dragging the whole effin drawer to the sink.
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We have a general “what is this shit” box for odds and ends and flyaway paper. When we can’t find something we know we saw somewhere or a bill or something like e go to that box. It’s really a tray. It helps us. It often sits on or near the table.
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Looooooook!
Got three baskets from Target, one is paper for drawing on (mostly scrap), pens/markers/crayons/etc., then the last one is colored paper/stickers/etc. One pile on the table is homework and papers to talk to Kiddo about, the other pile are extra work like wipeable books for letter practice and handwriting. They were sitting there forever unused because they were hidden.
Bonus: my cleaning vibes got Mr. Meet to clean the laundry room! It’s so much nicer in there and I have no idea what got removed so obviously it wasn’t important.
Also thank you @Meowkins for reminding me about the random toy baskets we already had. Their “out of sight out of mind” power was working a little too well.
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This got me thinking and I reckon I can tidy our art area tomorrow by nicking a set of drawers from our study…
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Amazing!
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This is a gorgeous table!!! Great job!!
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1 dishwasher run
4 loads of laundry (may or may not get folded tonight)
3 trips to storage room
2 trips to dumpsters
2 toilets scrubbed/wiped
1 catbox cleaned out
2 rooms vacuumed
aaaand 10 square feet of nasty carpet by the kitchen spot cleaned.
Husband is traveling solo this weekend. Somehow it’s a lot easier to keep up cleaning momentum without him around 
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Your table is so pretty! I love the color of the wood. Nice tidy! 
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I unfucked my fridge. It was a herculean effort. Please praise me.
Progress
End result
Yes yes I know I’m not storing some of the produce right. Guys I just can’t be fucked right now. I cleaned out the grime and the old food and now I gotta go put the 4 loads of laundry away and clean up the toddler mess b4 last day of hannukah.
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Impressive!
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