Random Questions

With a 3 month old, I say early and fully. That’s a very vulnerable age still.

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I think that all children should be celebrated equally, regardless of whether they are first, second …etc. I would throw a shower.

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Eh but showers proper are also about getting supplies to new parents. In this case they are now set up and don’t need the crowd sourcing as much??? That’s… My thought at least.

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While I know it is more common now to have a shower for a non-first kid, it doesn’t make sense to me. Maybe this is a more of a regional thing? I don’t know anyone personally who has had one.

If it feels good to celebrate child #2, maybe there’s a way to do so without so much consumerism? A party but where people are encouraged to bring something besides a physical gift, say instructions for a kid-friendly recipe? I don’t know, just brainstorming. I did go to a shower once where everyone was encouraged to bring a kids’ book instead of a more practical gift and that was really fun.

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Unfortunately, second+ showers are often seen as selfish, even though traditionally showers are thrown by other people for the mom- still can reflect negatively on her.

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I just figure the party stays the same and only the registry changes. Second kid registry is consumables: wipes, diapers, baby shampoo…etc. it’s not like everything a second baby needs will be covered by what’s passed down from first baby. Maybe the big crib that first baby had was great, but now second baby will be sleeping in the parents’ room and the crib doesn’t fit.

I know it’s not what “etiquette” for certain groups calls for, but this is where I fall on the matter. At the end of the day, the friends and family who want to celebrate with the soon to be parents should be able to do so.

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Maybe some of this is that where I’m from we throw “teas” for every baby and there’s none of this showers are selfish nonsense(in my eyes because of my culture and how I was raised). Also as the fifth kid born to my parents, I also push back against the idea that my arrival wouldn’t have merited its own celebration.

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my sister at a certain point just had showers where it was ‘bring a book for the kid’. she also has 5 kids, and really didn’t want more clothing or toys or things.

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I definitely wish it wasnt like that, I’ve definitely just heard some deeply judgmental shit over the years :cry: especially when there’s the “it’s a new dad but it hasn’t been that long since her last kid, she’s just getting free stuff to return for money”. I mean, I also come from a seriously toxic family at times, but a lesser degree of the sentiment seems pretty widespread.

ETA and I’m my dads 4th/my moms 3rd living kid. “Bonus baby” too. It’s definitely weird growing up with a cloud of “you weren’t on purpose”.

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My parents had a shower for both me and my brother. A shower is practically a requirement in my family for each child. If you don’t have one, my family kinda sees it as the baby being unwanted, like you don’t care to celebrate. They didn’t get as much at the shower for my brother as they did for me. Mainly because my parents were young and broke as fuck when they had me. When Bro came along five years later we were a lot better off financially. I think the majority of stuff at the second shower was just boy-themed clothes and new baby bottles.

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Thanks y’all! I think I’ll plan a smol shower with nuclear family in deference to COVID and also them being fairly set up.
Baked goods and decorations etc. :slight_smile:

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Due to circumstances, I think that someone will throw a shower. With it being second, it may be a friend throwing one, but if I don’t hear otherwise then I would.
ALSO Yayayayayyy she is a brave. And yayayayayyy into viability. They must have been riding a rollercoaster with timing being v similar as first smol child

But yes, focus is more on celebration than supplies.

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Yes. We were even planning mine for post baby, so basically everything was already ready, although one big thing was due to a wonderful friend shipping the crib before. I think celebrating is very nice.

We also aren’t big in decorations beyond a few balloons. But due to the oro family first grand arriving early I think that bug decorations and dressing up could be good if they suit sister

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Yes!! This one will pass it’s sibling if it stays in past December 2nd-- that will mark the equivalent gestation time that Nephew decided to arrive. But everyone would strongly prefer it makes it to the February C-section date. :grimacing::crossed_fingers::crossed_fingers::crossed_fingers::crossed_fingers::crossed_fingers::crossed_fingers::crossed_fingers::crossed_fingers:

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Does anyone have a small dog? My niece is adopting a 10 pound cutie and I want to send her a couple of coats. I cannot get measurements and don’t know if that would be a small or extra small for most doggy coat brands?

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That little Shitzu cutie from the pets thread?

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Yep! She needs cute clothes from her Aunty. :heart:

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Updating my own tv buying question:

Thank you everyone for the help! I decided to order an LG from Costco that has a black friday deal.

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Yeah, I think all in one place wouldn’t work, but this is an excellent structure overall. You may well not be surprised to hear that I still have shreddies in the shredder from… several years ago? And meanwhile a box of new things to shred… also from several years ago. So. Doing things like that immediately would be a good change. Just getting the shredder emptied and going again would be a start. Thank you!! :slight_smile: :slight_smile:

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Thank you to everyone else for your answers too. Will try things and pull out what works from each one. It’s really good to hear from folks who have been there, and who have found a way out… :slight_smile: :slight_smile:

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