I know it’s one of them there moving pictures.
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That is a really interesting question! I have moved quite a few times, and I think that my answer is a little different. I have lived two places that I didn’t like, and I didn’t like them immediately. It wasn’t really my choice to move there, we went for dh’s school and then a work move.
In both places, I did eventually have plenty of friends and activities and a job that I liked, so it’s not that my life was awful, it was that I just didn’t like that place. (These places were Ypsilanti, MI & Youngstown.) I’d say that in both cases I didn’t like the weather, but I loved Pittsburgh and it had the same damn weather.
Both of them were places that I found de-energizing. They were both obsessed with “things used to be better” and I didn’t have any connection with them from the times that were better. Both were economically depressed and seemed intent on shooting themselves in the foot.
I mean, I’ve moved to someplace that actually has worse weather but I like everything else so much better.
We read a book at church on the theme of “how to love the place you live” and then the author came and gave a talk. I asked her what if you did everything she suggested and you still didn’t like it and she say “sometimes is just not the place for you.” It was so freeing, because I did feel bad about how annoying I found Youngstown even though I had a nice life there.
I think dh, who very much wanted to move, is having a much harder time with it. As I think about it, I don’t think he’s ever had a good friend who wasn’t at work or school with him, and he doesn’t know where to start.
I think it takes me about a year to feel settled in a new place - by then I’ve built a new routine, know where to go with things, know how to get places, have connections. Dh has always had the experience of walking right into work and having all the connections just exist for him, so this is a radically different experience for him and I can see that he’s not loving it.
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I typically know fairly quickly if I like the area I’m in. I’ve lived in small towns and then big metro areas where if I don’t like my immediate area I research and move to a neighborhood that I will like.
It takes me about 9 years to feel like somewhere is Home compared to my favorite Homes.
There have totally been places that grew on me over time as I explored more of the various cultures. There have totally been places I fell in love with immediately (Pittsburgh in particular; my impression was that its all my favorite things about Seattle without the pretention). This question made me think for a couple days and realize I’ve never lived somewhere I actively disliked even when I’ve lived in places where not one single person was remotely like me and people openly thought I was strange.
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thats so funny, i also just had a huge “i love this place” feeling about pittsburgh when i first came here. i was in high school and visiting carnegie mellon and just had that feeling driving past the dinosaur and the museum in oakland.
in terms of knowing how you feel about a place, i kept trying to love boulder when we ended up there. it is beautiful there but i couldnt find my crowd. many folks there seemed obsessed with fitness and looked upon my fatness as some kind of cooties they were afraid of catching. also i hated how dry and sunny and treeless it was. not for me, i am an east coast swamp person.
but it took me a good two years to figure it out – id never lived anywhere that i couldnt make work before and just kept trying.
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I loved Boulder when I was in school there, but it was a long time ago and Boulder was very different.
I have a good friend who also lived in Ypsilanti, but well after we had escaped, and she loved it. Her experiences were really different - they had a house in what was really the suburbs of Ann Arbor and they did the “fun” things there, and their kids were born there. I, OTOH, was broke and lived in an apartment where food froze in the cupboards and the public library ran out of money and closed for 6 months. We mutually did not love Youngstown, though. 
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These responses are helpful to read, thanks all!
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I have no intention of moving but I really like the conversation this has sparked.
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I think because I’m the granddaughter, daughter, and a merchant myself a lot of it for me is if I find shops and shopkeepers I like. If I find my tribe? Yes, but I’ve always managed that, more or less, and have lived several times where the population/attitudes didn’t fit mine basically.
I need to find routes to places I want to go, shops/shopkeepers I like, and not feel threatened.
That probably takes 2-3 years.
I’ve lived in/around Los Angeles, Arizona, Georgia, Florida, and New England.
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I’m relating to this bit a lot. Just comparing the economic reality here versus other areas I lived… I think this has a lot to do with it. It’s mostly stuff that wouldn’t affect you that much on a short trip here because people only go to like 3 neighborhoods when they visit (very atypical neighborhoods at that), but it has a pretty big impact when you live here.
There’s just a depressed kind of vibe, which I know sounds woo woo but I don’t mean it that way. I don’t think energy is a supernatural thing, I think some people are hyper observant and what they/we describe as energy is actually a collection of micro observations that happen subconsciously. IDK, maybe I will learn to live with it better. I think I just totally wasn’t expecting it. I’m trying to fight it as much as I can because I wish I could see what other people see here, but the feeling is hard to ignore.
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Has it changed a lot since you moved there? Has the pandemic hit extra hard? I think I remember you enjoying it at first, so it must be even tougher now to not be as happy there as you had hoped to be. I’m so sorry that’s happened. Does husband have options with his job? Or would a move entail him switching?
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There are many things that are objectively easier for me here, so that’s what I enjoyed/still enjoy, but meeting a basic need and fulfilling a preference aren’t really the same thing, if that makes sense? I’m super limited in where I can live due to like a million annoying obstacles so we could move but only to certain places and most would probably be worse in a lot of ways than where I am now. The pandemic did hit hard here but the poverty rate was really high before too. We’re definitely open to moving again but IDK if it would really be prudent and it’s definitely not something I have the energy to arrange super soon.
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I’ve never been to Philly but I’ve often gotten the sense that it has a similar vibe to a lot of Rust Belt cities.
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I’ve been wanting to get a new microwaveable heating pad and also have been dragging my feet about looking into it, so I just bought this one - thanks! I’ve been influenced.
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I hope you like it!!
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Will keep you posted! Watch for an update in 5-7 business days 
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I have just taken cuttings from several plants (a pothos and heart-shaped philodendren) and am trying to propagate them in soil. The internet says indirect sunlight. In winter, can I place them in front of an east or west-facing window? Or should I put them on the dining room table (about 6 feet away from the west window) where the light would really be indirect? If it helps, I know that directly in front of the window in summer is too much for them, but not sure about this time of year.
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I think in winter the sunshine will be indirect enough. Also, pothos and philodendrens are really hard to kill. I don’t think you can go wrong.
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Any thoughts on how often to water them as I’m waiting for them to root? The internet says it takes about 3 weeks, but not to overwater. I have not propagated cuttings in soil before, but haven’t had luck with transplanting them after rooting in water. Strangely, I am sentimental about these two plants because I got them as a child. They have names.
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I’m not an expert on propagating but I do think not overwatering would still be key. I think I’d aim for a middle ground. Not let them get as dry as I might normally, but don’t keep them mushy-wet. No more than once a week, I’d think.
I get sentimental about plants, too, and I’ve named plants, too. I get it!
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It’ll depend on your potting soil, humidity, and how much sunlight, so I go based on feeling the soil. While they’re trying to root, you don’t want them to dry out. For my spider plants I usually do a tiny bit of water (like 1/4 cup or less) every few days for minimal but even moisture 
Once they’re established I do a small amount once a week.
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