I haven’t pulled that card yet because Latte is SO SO SO good with Luna and I’m scared about putting too much on the big sister card. But it’s definitely the big guns if I need to. Good reminder though that if I want to do that, I’ll need to discuss it when Latte is calm.
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A little over a year left of it then 
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D1 reacts well to the Daniel Tiger phrase “if you feel so angry that you want to roar, take a deep breath and count to four”. She usually calms down, counts to four, but then starts crying again relatively soon about the same thing. It’s usually a lot quieter that time.
D2 has started screaming and lashing out and yelling so so loudly. I tell her that she is too loud and hurting my ears so I have to walk away, but I will talk to her when she’s quieter.
Anytime one of them is sad or mad or upset in any way I tell them that I know they are upset and I’m very sorry about it and they continue on from there depending on the situation. They both do very week calming down in the snuggle swing still. Maybe if you take it away for a bit it will be ok again?
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It’s been down for quite a while, we swap out all the attachments periodically. It just did a 2 day stint up and she didn’t use it once. Not even for hide and seek.
If I try to leave the room Latte will often follow and continue loudly scream crying in my proximity, although come to think of it’s that’s better the last couple weeks. I don’t want her to feel abandoned for her feelings or anything though. If it isn’t insanely loud I’m happy to sit with her through it. But I’m so sound sensitive. And I hate the sensation of earplugs. Bad combo lol.
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Not on the topic of screaming, because I have different battles, but on parenting two kids. All you can do is try your best. Kid two might have more cortisol but will have the least you can provide. Kid one might be forever broken by not being solo. It is necessary to choose one sometimes, and for a while that means the baby needs their needs met before the bigger kid’s wants.
I failed today but I did my best. And I told my big kid that we were both doing our best and it was still hard and then I screamed at him to lie down every three minutes for an hour (that was the second, melatonin sponsored hour of bedtime)
You guys are making bank and can buy them therapy later
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This is fair 
my mom always told us growing up “I’m the mom you get for free. If you want a better one, get a good job and buy one”
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I am willing this to be true so hard (1 month to go).
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Thinking about this in retrospect
(1) I didn’t expect a 5yo to still be falling down on the floor in the store screaming;
(2) it was usually when I was not very clear about what was going to happen before we did things;
(3) we had a lot going on that year?
Baby sister, cross country move, kindergarten, weird apartment, new weather… so I can see that we were all stretched thin.
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My 5 year old still throws tantrums but they have become more logical most of the time and there are fewer of them. Sometimes they do last longer probably because of power struggles that are slowly being addressed.
The 2 year old on the other hand is just tamping up the throw yourself on the floor screaming tantrums so that’s fun…
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I guess what’s going on with my kid is more high drama than outright tantrums. We don’t get a lot of floor of the store stuff with either kid. It’s more just wailing and stomping when suuuper minor things don’t go their way. It drives me crazy because it sounds exactly like they’re seriously hurt (or we’re hurting them - please neighbor don’t call CPS when I do the buckle on my kids car seat instead of letting her do it) and half the time I come running at top speed just to find out that, “Kid 2 said something that hurt my feelings.”
Ok kid, your feelings are important but that sounded like you just got stabbed. Maybe that’s not the right tone/pitch for the situation?
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When BB was like 5 and going through a period of extreme disregulation, I did this game with him that I think I read about in Janet Lansbury? The idea was that we would chase each other around the courtyard and then you would catch the person and hug them. So it was very full body and involved squeezing, but it was not exactly snuggling.
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Latte def needs a regular supply of rough and tumble play. Absolutely. Which is part of why our front room/former dining room looks like a gymnasium lol.
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Parents with sensory seeking kids, have you had any success with lava lamps?
I haven’t tried but that’s an amazing idea.
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Not lava lamps but the DIY bottle that you(they) shake up and then watch till it stops moving. The was the go to in Kiddos pre k ese class in lieu of a time out. The kids could shake their feelings into it at the back table then they sat and stared at it till it stopped moving, then they could return to the group. Plastic also stood up well to if it got thrown which I didn’t witness but I’m sure has happened.
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We have one and I’d say thrown on carpet OK, tiles not so much.
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I am flying as sole adult with 2 preteens and a baby who will be 16 months and in her own seat. How should I occupy my baby on the plane?
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Snackle box, many walks up the aisle, busy book?
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Yes to LadyDuck’s suggestions, plus pom balls, sticker books, water wow, play doh (maybe too young), and even post its! Sippy cup or water bottle for during take off and landing.
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My current favorite baby carrier is on lightening deal for $25
Limited-time deal: Momcozy Baby Wrap Carrier Slings, Infant Carrier Slings for Newborn up to 50 lbs, Baby Wrap Adjustable for Adult Fits Sizes XXS-XXL, Easy to Wear Baby Carriers, Ergonomic Front Facing/Back, Lake Blue https://a.co/d/3JmXQPp