Oh no. My husband LOVES lady Gaga. He’s now rewriting the whole song to fit the book 
what have you done.
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Tape it! Tape it all. And share it here. We won’t tell.
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@Bracken_Joy agreed. My husband would like to know how to do this, if your husband is successful 
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My Imperfect Foods delivery is usually here by now but I don’t even have the “on the way” text yet. I am crabby because I am craving hot chocolate made from scratch but we have no milk or almond milk until it shows up.
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The baby has gastro 
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I think he’s got stage fright now he won’t repeat the one verse he did so I can transcribe it, and he’s withholding further information.
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Kiddo currently has a book with a little sister character who is kind of bitchy. The lines of hers that I read and the lines on the page do not match. This is one downside of Kiddo eventually learning to read but thankfully we’re not quite there yet and the book will be out of rotation before that happens. Unfortunately I know other terrible ones will sneak in.
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Our mortgage payment is due on the 15th of the month but we still haven’t gotten our statement. Good thing they don’t charge a late fee until the last day of the month.
Oh and the fact that my Dad absolutely will not let me sign him up to receive his statements online. Omg this man is so damn stubborn about the dumbest ass things I swear.
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More baby board book complaining. This is fine until the last two spreads and then just like… what? Did they run up against a timeline? Did they switch writers? Rhyme and then the whole structure just goes out the door.
OKAY ITS BACKWARD whatever
Spoilered for length
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Yeah, I assumed Cobalt was a girl before I scrolled down. And I maintain that until proven otherwise.
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MIL just returned from an overnight at BIL’s house. BIL’s baby has a really bad cold. What cold? Why cold? Why allow a visitor? Why no Covid test?
HOW TF do you even catch a cold in 2020? I am excellent at catching colds and have never before in my life gone (counts fingers) 8? Months without one. Actually 9 or 10 because I was making to avoid a late pregnancy cold and then tomavoid rumoured covid unnamed virus
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Nooooo 
I switch up genders a lot in picture books. It is so crap that all the construction vehicles in Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site are male - when I read it I change the pronouns.
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My complaint:
Diet culture
Lizzo is promoting a weight loss juice cleanse on IG nooooooooo.
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True, only about half are given pronouns! That helps.
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This morning, Boy Kitty caught a mouse and ran around the entire apartment with it in his little kitty mouth. It escaped and ran into a huge hole that now exists near our front stairs that lead directly outside (probably because of all the construction that’s going on downstairs), so now at least we know where they are getting in and stuffed the area with steel wool.
When Boyfriend was going down the stairs to put the steel wool in, he fell down the stairs. He’s OK other than some big scrapes.
Then, I checked email, and I have a return request from some Karen who insists the size of my ornament was inaccurate (it isn’t) and that my work is cheap and not worth the money. So, that’s awesome and I feel great about my business right now. 
Boyfriend made me feel a little bit better by saying she probably refuses to wear a mask and voted for Trump. Seriously, if you don’t like something, fine, but do you have to be nasty about it? Merry fucking Xmas!
(Tiny victory: if she received it and didn’t like it, then this at least means USPS is now delivering things finally?)
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I became infamous at work for saying 2 things: “babies are users” and “kids the gift that keeps on taking.” People repeated those for years. When you work for the state the people never change. My oldest son is 47 and had a fisher price Joey doll. He was 2 and had it at the zoo. Some asshole told his child to move out of the way so “she” could see the animals. Being a jerk because he had a doll.
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How can you not just go and snuggle after seeing that
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Look how scared she is of the cat, though. His terrorism is hilarious. Who needs tv when you have a tiny, soft bully?
She’s scared to move her feet, here.
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The little ones are always the boss. It’s funny. My 5lb Maltese once had my son’s 80lb dog cornered and Dodge was crying. I had to rescue him:)).
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