Random questions, postpartum edition

Do you have any suggestions for figuring out what basic philosophies are even out there? I admit this may be a dumb question.

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See and I feel like the courses can be really valuable for getting co-parents on the same page with specific approaches to stuff. And I find I have way less anxiety having a plan for different scenarios. I also enjoy the process of trying to optimize in my life, including various parenting topics. Definitely worth paying attention to anxiety versus empowerment.

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That’s a tricky question because even answering it can end up alienating people by how you describe the different ideologies out there! Honestly I don’t know of any central guide, that would be really valuable.

Some of the most common and most distinct ideologies you’ll find though include attachment parenting, Montessori, REI, ummm I’ll brainstorm on others.

ETA oh and “gentle parenting” for discipline.

Psych wise you’ll see discussion of “authoritarian, authoritative, and permissive” parenting.

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Thought of a couple other ends of spectrums- you’ll hear about “helicopter parents” versus “free range parents”

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Thank you! I’ve got some words to type into YouTube now!

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That was my hope! And a stupid tool but decent way to learn some terms that occurred to me is look at the results for things like “what type of mom are you” quizzes. I’ve seen things like unicorn mom, wine mom, etc etc. Most are tongue in cheek I think, but a decent starting point to read some of how people self identify (and/or labels they lob at others as weapons).

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Maybe? It’s hard because I don’t really have what I consider a parenting philosophy (except my own personal “don’t be outnumbered” one, lol). I don’t worry too much about fitting any particular method or style and go off of intuition, learning my specific child (again and again), researching different questions as they come up, and checking out the variety of answers for a combination of professional consensus and what jives with my life, preferences, situation, and specific child.

I read a lot before having her just because the topic interested me, so little exposures over time helped me get more familiar with the basic ideas of approaches and styles. So start digging in but don’t think you have to cram for an exam or anything. Here’s a thing with lots of different ideas: https://www.playgroundequipment.com/23-parenting-philosophies-and-methods-explained/

Idk if it’s all 100% accurate, and there’s a lot of overlap, but it might at least give you some words to start with.

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I was legit wishing there was some sort of cosmo quiz equivalent, I don’t know why I thought that wouldn’t exist!!

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An excellent mindset. Thank you!

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Omg you totally found what I couldn’t! Perfect.

And YES this isn’t stuff you all need to know ahead of time. Passing familiarity can be nice for sure, but I’m always reading and learning as we go. I don’t tend to dig in until right before we expect to reach a phase, as we have concerns/want to refine, OR areas I think we need extra work to be sure we’re on the same page.

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Oh, and watch Bluey because it’s good advice (albeit from a cartoon dog) and just a cute and amazing show. :joy:

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I am super hoping my kid gets into Bluey!!

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And thus the Australian accent will be spread across the world, muahahah

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Huh! I never thought of myself as a “slow” parent but that’s a label that definitely fits us; and could be useful to describe to relatives etc around some choices we make.

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I’ve heard even if your kid doesn’t watch Bluey, you should still watch as a parent, because it’s some of the best parent modeling you can find. Esp for dealing with toddlers.

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Certainly not above pre-viewing. I just read something about HBO pulling Sesame Street? Really hoping this is not true

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I’ve actually heard that one from a blogger I like! Super interesting and I think it describes a lot of what my mom did when I was growing up. Lots of “bored? You fix it!” Haha

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I just really hate feeling over scheduled. Like. We’re currently all at our small local park, in the grass. Latte is rolling around on my lap pretending to be a puppy. We’re watching airplanes etc.

A bit part of me being a SAHM is this slower pace of life.

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We talked about how our parents treated us and what we would like to do the same or differently. You can start with what you know before you read on the other stuff.

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That’s a great point. Take it back to favorite memories, things you hated, traditions you loved, so on. How you were disciplined and how you feel about that in retrospect.

A loooooot of parenting is confronting your own childhood and how you feel about it.

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