I’m listening to it rn and it’s not over yet but I like posting my reactions here in real time. It’s so bizarre how he has that break away part talking about how Americans aren’t as socially mobile as they think they are (disagree, I think many Americans, especially poor people, believe there is no social mobility at all…poverty mindset is so real and so damaging). And he’s going on about how not everyone can boot strap themselves, etc, and it just seems so off topic?
It’s especially odd in context as minutes prior he was saying that someone “only” spending $250 at Target couldn’t possibly be a problem financially! I mean isolated sure, but if you shop twice a month like that (or more?!) I mean…that’s a huge amount of money. Especially over time! Just seems funny to talk about how social mobility is so rare in one breath and how dropping an unscheduled $250 makes no difference in the next, lol!
Hmmm I agree the tech bro dream/drop out social mobility dream did seem out of place. It seems very different than the underlying context of this couple. But trying to connect the points – maybe Ramit is re-contextualizing roadblocks to goals? This couple said they had no shared goals. The fight over $250 (yes it is a lot of money but they make 6 figures) that happens over and over precludes any conversations about them actual journeying towards any kind of life/money/relationship success long term (like how Tami’s parents had the same fights and are still married as an elderly couple but it’s not like they ever ended up happy, they just settled into being miserable forever). I was hearing Ramit say: someone who drops out is unlikely to become wealthy but everyone wants to have what Mark Zuckerberg college dropout has. It’s more prudent and statistically likely to have the goal of graduating college, study toward it, and have a regular career and eventually end up wealthy and happy enough. Given their families context this couple has no roadmap of how to end up with security and happiness (Ramit says they play defense and basically refuse to go on the offensive). So their studying and going to class needs to be suggesting new things and working through issues (like how he made them talk about how they could enjoy kayaking together) instead of getting stuck in the weeds (Target trips) and believing somehow in 20 years they’ll have a magically different and happy life.
Ooo, I like how Ramit points out how the guy got all the “points” for that travel surprise but then didn’t have to actually change at all since he cancelled it. I also thought it was interesting how the guy was so mortified at the idea of his son saying the exact same things he says to his wife, to his wife. Interesting episode!
I just read the transcript. That part where he was like “if any of my friends talked to each other like this, I would be worried, this is not okay” was a relief. They were so mean! And it took so much work from him to get them to stop snarking at each other for like a whole two sentences!
I’m not sure what my takeaways are from this episode besides “don’t be a controlling asshat!” I mean, also probably a good lesson in the way that controlling very visible expenses can give you a false sense of control.
Seriously! I was glad when they admitted that the “jokes” are not actually jokes at all.
In the very beginning when she says all she can focus on is winning an argument and she like blacks out and doesn’t even know what she says…uhhhh she better stop this immediately before their child gets any older than 2. Because they will definitely remember, source: my childhood I go to therapy for. I think overall she comes off “nicer” in the episode especially since Mike’s condescension is pretty misogynistic, but this is
i’m in the intro of this week’s ep and already rolling my eyes and shifting around my chair. she says that they knew going in to being parents, if they didn’t want to recreate what they experienced as children, they would just have to “be better.”
what an amazing plan. wow. why don’t people just be better? i bet that would totally work
@MonkeyJenga would like you all to know that I am living my Rich Life. There’s a merino wool hat that I saw at Sierra, and they had it in green, blue, and pink. I liked the pink one the best and got it, even though it was $13 and the green one was only $10, so I paid $3 extra to get my preferred color
I like it so much that I’m getting the green one for Marmalade. I don’t know if he’s as excited as I am about having matching hats.
There’s still a few left if any of you want the same hat!
Episode 29 is really interesting! Finally it’s a couple that aren’t totally filthy rich, and he mentioned the show has gotten lots of feedback about not only talking to millionaires so I think there will be more. This couple is still really high income but they have a negative net worth and loads of cc debt.
ETA: Wow, he gets super pissed at these people. Way angrier than at anyone else he’s had on the show. Interesting…
Just listened, and found it super interesting! I laughed at his “OK, you can make fun of me for not knowing what a shed is” sidebar. We have two sheds that came with the house and truly have no idea what to do with them, so it’s not just Ramit.
Only speaking for myself, I would find it very stressful to be a part of this marriage! The husband’s difficulty trusting others sounds haaard. I appreciated how reflective he was willing to be. I would be very interested to hear a 6-month follow-up from them to see what they do or don’t change.
Also, question for anyone who follows Ramit more closely than I have: what is his thinking behind the “no store cards” advice? I did some Googling and it seems like he’s a strong proponent of only having 1-2 cards?
Wondering that as well! I forget which episode but he really seemed to have it out for the Old Navy cardholding woman lol. Whomst is me. (Mine is GAP but they’re under the same umbrella.) I use it maybe 2-3 times a year, see benefits, and always pay it off completely. Maybe it’s just a simplicity thing?
Yeah! It wouldn’t make sense if you weren’t paying them off every month, but then to me the advice would be pay down debt, make a budget, make changes to better align your income and expenses, not to have fewer cards? Idk!
I think it’s a bit of a cliche for people to sign up for store cards for the immediate discount and then kind of forget about them/the card company screws up (on purpose?) and never sends the bill to the right place. I’ve heard that story a couple times, but I have no idea how true or actually widespread it is.
