Baby gear: What do you really need?

Parenting
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There is a LOT. Even though I was incredibly familiar with baby gear, given my job was basically Super Babysitting, it was still super overwhelming. Things I found most helpful: “baby gear I regret” and “most helpful baby gear” type videos on YouTube. Lucie’s list. And looking at other people’s registeries.

Also though? I was pretty sure stuff would go wrong so I didn’t work on ANY of this until I was past my 20 week ultrasound. I still had stuff set up and ready with weeks to spare. (I mean, I went to 41 weeks but STILL)

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82

Seconding this. If you are enjoying learning about all this now as a way to stay engaged (and hopeful) then it’s not too early to start making lists. But, I couldn’t/wouldn’t think about it until after 20 weeks* and didn’t start purchasing things until 30 weeks and it was plenty of time.

*We got a free crib from a friend at 19 weeks because she was moving and basically said “I know you aren’t in the right headspace for this but the movers will drop it off as we drive by your apartment or it’s going to the good will around the corner from you.”

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You have time, lol! It’s not going to be on the exam tomorrow.

Everyone has their most used whatever or their I hated the whatnot, but the reason there’s so many options and so little consensus is that babies don’t really come with an instruction manual (and each one would have their own anyway). There isn’t one perfect anything and a lot of options will get you to the same point—a perfectly happy thriving baby.

Lifestyle, price point, available supports are going to vary, and so the preferred list is going to vary. There are things I’d change if I was starting over with my daughter, but if I was having a second I wouldn’t necessarily toss out the idea of anything I didn’t use/need for the first because that baby might prefer it!

Someone’s must have list is going to be someone else’s useless list and that’s fine. The key is building up what you think makes sense to you and being ready to pivot to a new option if your family or baby needs it.

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84

Yeah.

And count me in the “had nothing at 20 weeks and started buying at that point” group. Don’t do it unless it’s fun! Also, splitting the research with the other parent (if there’s another parent, I know there is in @greyweld’s case) gives you each an area of competence.

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85

Yes! I told SirB that stroller shopping was basically car shopping, and thus it was in his sphere. As were baby monitor (camera and then later audio only).

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86

As far as sleeping arrangements, my youngest sister spent a few nights in a dresser drawer (I don’t recall why, but probably low space/money, and high procrastination).

And this is always a good read :blush:

(Not that I recommend a box, but it always struck me as a reminder to not sweat the small stuff? I say this now… Anyway.)

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87

GM is definitely in charge of the baby monitor, as he is nervous about video based security systems and the privacy thereof. So he can research what is the least likely to have the signal picked up or something that is over internet and password protected.

50/50 odds he makes his own with an Arduino.

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88

I have officially crammed for my exam tomorrow on the excellent Lucie’s list. I expect to get at least a 60.

I’m not anxiety researching. Nope.

I’m definitely going to have trouble falling asleep because I’ll be thinking about strollers and car seats.

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89

I remember being BEWILDERED when I was newly pregnant with BB. I was obsessed with things like whether I should try to have some kind of sidecar sleeping arrangement and what kinds of carriers and cloth diapers* existed. There is SO MUCH STUFF and it all relates to decisions that seem extremely important at the time (if less so in the rearview mirror) like breastfeeding.

*These are a whole other category of confusion. When I was pregnant with LB I had a pregnant friend who wanted to cloth diaper but was confused, and I literally had her over to my house so I could show her my diapers.

Anyway, just to say, I am sitting with you in this moment of anxiety research and sending virtual hugs.

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90

I’m also jumping between “only barely believe I’m pregnant” and “really want to go to the once upon a child right next to the grocery store and buy everything”.

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91

Somewhere in between that is “go to Once Upon A Child and look at how everything works to get ideas”, if you prefer. Personally, I enjoyed buying good deals as I found them even before pregnancy and in early pregnancy (all three of them), even if it meant (as it did for me) putting them away for longer than I’d planned as a hope chest of sorts.

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92

One sentiment I see over and over from the baby registry YouTube videos is, nothing works for everyone, and you can’t perfectly game it out in advance. There are going to be frantic 3am purchases, and for some reason that puts me at ease :joy:. We live in an amazing time in history when you can buy something online and have it arrive same or next day.

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93

I’ve heard those called “faith purchases” and always liked that. And I agree- we went to Buy Buy Baby a couple times and just walked around, overwhelmed but letting our brains start to wrap around it all! Especially the car seats and strollers, those were very overwhelming for me.

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94

A friend of mine was very early with her first living child (32 weeks?) and after two prior second tri losses she had NOTHING. She literally ordered it all on Amazon while she was at the hospital. Once she got out, she and her husband put it together. By the time the baby was discharged from the NICU she had a full nursery to come home to lol. It’s crazy how easy it is to get stuff online if needed!

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95

How is the graco modes? Is it the pramette? Tell me everything. I was looking at the evenflo omni but the reviews say it isn’t sturdy enou for daily walks. And basically that pushes me towards the obscenely expensive strollers

96

Diapers - I did used cloth, and our hospitals require you to bring in a package of disposable newborn. We ended up doing disposable at night forever. Friends gifted me a diaper service and I highly recommend that to try cloth without washing.
Diaper stuff - wipes or washcloths and squirt bottle. I dropped out of cloth wipes. I like water wipes and rascal and friends wipes
Diaper cream - Vaseline? And I did sudocrem but any zinc will do
The plastic or vinyl change things to throw wherever for changes.

Unscented soap, laundry detergent etc

Swaddles, burp cloths (pre fold diapers), face cloths, towels

Outerwear as appropriate

Ten each of onesies and PJs up to six months, super cheap at once upon a child or from Facebook
Socks and mittens as appropriate

Sleeping and walking - they are the same thing
Oh man, I’m in a fight on babycentre right now because I said I’m not into using the car seat on a stroller or in the house.

Car seat - whatever is certified I don’t care
Stroller - I need one with a bassinet for the first six months, a tiny folding one for after and we got our SUV as a double (Thule chariot). The uppababy bassinet IS certified as a safe sleep surface for off the stroller in most countries. To my knowledge no others are
Crib - I did Ikea crib and mattress, all new cribs here are safe. And I trust ikea for mattress non toxicity.
Two or three sheets and a mattress protector
This time I’m doing a bassinet for our room and travel probably fisher price stow n go
Baby wearing. I was given a bunch of wraps and slings and tried and found what works for me
The yoga ball - not just for when your pelvis hurts too much to sit! Also for bouncing with baby while sleeping upright! I also hear rocking chairs are a thing
A swaddle blanket on the floor
Research the safe sleep seven - planned cosleeping is MUCH safer than emergency cosleeping. I did the first few times on a yoga mat on the floor, until I knew what was safe for me

Seriously, if you dive into one topic, it should be safer sleep. Because if your plan a fails you will be too tired to research

Breastfeeding and not
A travel mug and an insulated straw cup to have water and tea/coffee with you at all times
Some hand me down nursing clothes and bras so you know what to buy online in an emergency. Personally I only need one or two outfits for appointments and visitors because I would rather haul a t shirt up
A bottle in case you need it
Read the instructions on formula once in case you need it
A friend who has done this and will answer text messages. Preferably one in Australia also for time zone issues
Protein bars or Lara bars

A baby thermometer and nail clippers and snot sucker or the salt water pods

Regarding Amazon… only get stuff from known brands that are safety certified. They have a huge problem with allowing third parties to sell baby and toddler gear that isn’t safe.

IKEA is aweso because they try to meet a bunch of international regulations and are cheap and fit my vibe of being a cheap hippy - Montessori style wood stuff at a good price etc.

We did regular backpacks for diapers and I did buy wet bags. Regular laundry baskets and garbage bins, not diaper pails

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I absolutely advocate this. Even as someone who never co-slept. Harm reduction is real and brilliant and life saving.

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This too. Strollers, car seats, bath products/lotions, wipes, formulas, and diapers I only will buy from brick and mortars not Amazon. The way they stack by SKU for fulfillment, even reputable brands fulfilled by Amazon can be intermixed with counterfeits from third party sellers. So any health and safety related item, I don’t risk it. Diapers we know are especially counterfeited often.

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This is an excellent point. I just looked up statistics and was surprised that well over half of parents eventually co-sleep. We planned to have our guest bed move to an in-nursery bed, so I can plan to have that set up as optimally as possible for the likely event of co-sleep. I may need to figure out how to get a firm mattress topper or something, because it’s a bit softer than is I think advised.

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100

We had one of these, which may or may not be the safest thing, but is better than just bringing the baby into bed with you at 2 am. It was AMAZING for middle of the night nursing, and for being able to put a hand in to pat a fussy baby without needing to actually get out of bed and stumble around.

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It only worked because we have a king sized bed, and neither of us are very big/tall people, so we had lots of space, and because it was summer and we could leave the covers off. They make them with higher sides, which would probably be better.

ETA - this one looks nice! They only had fancy ones that either wouldn’t fit in our space (bc king bed) or didn’t look very sturdy when our youngest was a newborn.

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