Random Questions

I’d argue a stay at home mom is a situation that needs meds the most - there’s a ton of task switching which can be the thing ADHD brains struggle with most, a lot of scheduling, etc. The medication should help your brain move tracks more smoothly vs getting caught in distractions. (In my experience it doesn’t remove the potential for hyperfocus so you still have to watch out for that re: time management)

I think it’s also worth it to get a diagnosis to try and parse out if it’s only ADHD or if there’s more in play (spoiler alert: there’s almost always more in play, usually of the depression and/or anxiety variety).

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Not an ADHDer but married to one! If you feel like everything is working fine, I would say absolutely no need to make a change just for the sake of doing it, you know?

My wife got a diagnosis and meds as an adult, and I’d say it’s helped her with:

  • Sense of self/self esteem: her brain works differently and that’s why she, say, struggles to keep her office tidy - not that something is wrong with her
  • Finding strategies to get things done that she cares about that are recommended for ADHD brains - eg she has an elaborate calendar/alarm system to keep track of events that I think she found as an ADHD friendly solution
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I don’t have ADHD but I am a SAHM and we strongly suspect Mr. Meer does after getting Kiddo through diagnosis and getting medication for Kiddo.

+1 to SAHMing requiring a lot of task switching and lots of executive functioning - I am the calendar keeper, the planner of summer camps and vacations, the director of “x and then y and then z need to happen to get out the door this morning”, etc.

Mr. Meer chose not to pursue getting a diagnosis or medication due to his age and life experience, but knowing more about ADHD has made a loooooot of sense for how he experiences the world versus how I experience it, if that makes sense. I suspect ten year old Mr. Meer and ten year old Kiddo have different levels of ADHD as well, but that’s entirely a guess on my part.

Kiddo has said that he likes who he is better when he’s on his medication (for example, he was making very unkind comments to classmates on unmedicated days and then immediately wishing he hadn’t said that but of course that’s not how spoken language works.) So it might be worth trying.

Oh, I also have a cousin who didn’t get diagnosed with ADHD until after she was 40 and when she was medicated she said it was like that “the clouds part and the sun shines through” moment because suddenly all the noise in her head quieted down and is this how other people have been living this whole time?! Not to say you’re guaranteed an amazing outcome, but it is at least a possibility.

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My sister is on ADHD meds, and although she’s not a SAHM, she reports the biggest difference is to her overall energy levels. She was zonked by like 7pm and sleeping like 10 hours a night and still feeling dead on her feet, I think because she was spending so much energy working around her own brain

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Thanks y’all. Much to consider. It seems like it’s probably worth it, but, ugh, the process!

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The irony in this statement, my dear. Perhaps that’s your answer- it’s worth it so that an additional task doesn’t seem insurmountable.

(But yes I can’t help but be reminded of Hyperbole and a Half comparing the process of renewing her ADHD meds to putting a heart patients pills on top of a mountain. What do you mean you have to do the thing you can’t do to treat the thing?!)

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Yeah I don’t want to helicopter parent my kid as he gets to the teen and early adult years but at the same time the appointments, the thirty-day-only prescriptions, etc. are practically designed to be as anti-ADHD as possible. It’s bonkers.

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It truly does feel that way. I’m going to add it to my list and hope that I get to it on one of my “do all the things!” days.

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This reminds me that a friend has used L-theanine and found it helpful for her mild ADHD. I’ve been meaning to try it out for myself but, ha, it never makes it to the top of the list.

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Have people bought stuff from Quince? I want some specific items from Everlane but I don’t really have a full price Everlane kind of budget, and it seems like Quince has similar things for a lot cheaper…but are they good? Specifically their sweater-like items?

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Have not personally bought but I’ve heard great things about their cashmere, mixed opinions about the merino. I have a pair of linen pants from them that are very nice.

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I have a few Quince sweaters! I would say they are lower quality than, say, an Everlane sweater, but they are better quality than other items at their price point.

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I’m a big fan of Quince. I have quite a few of their items. I’m a big fan of their 100% natural fiber items and have been very pleased with the quality to price point ratio for those. The only items I have from them that I didn’t like are non-natural fiber-- two lounge clothing items and those have pilled, stretched, and otherwise not been great.

My absolute favorite Quince item is the Quince Boyfriend sweater in organic cotton. I also love my cashmere cardigan (Bought during a Black Friday sale-- they don’t do many sales though). I have a cotton t shirt, cotton tank top, linen skirt, linen tank top, cotton cardigan, cotton bralettes-- these are all items I would not hesitate to buy again. I have a couple silk items that are nice but don’t really fit my actual lifestyle (I wanted to be someone who wears silk, but my life is far too casual for that, even when it is washable!) I just bought some of their cotton gauze pants secondhand but it is too soon to tell how I will like those. All this and there are still items that remain on my wish list!

My main complaint about Quince is that they aren’t very adventurous in their colors. I tend to wish for more color variety than they offer as I’m not that into neutrals.

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I guess anecdotes will do you in sometimes. I had an Everlane sweater that pilled so badly and quickly that it put me off the brand entirely. I do get a bit of pilling with my Quince cashmere cardigan (and none at all on the other Quince sweaters I own), but nothing like the one I had from Everlane. It is entirely possible I just ordered a bad sweater from Everlane and good items from Quince.

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We are in reverse sweater universes! My two Quince cashmere sweaters are pill-y messes, but I still wear them. @mountainmustache29 please report back on your level of pilling so the people can know

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I’m curious if you have one of the $50 cashmere sweaters, or one of the pricier ones? I haven’t tried the $50 cashmere yet-- the one I have is quite a bit pricier (but again, I bought on a discount over Black Friday a couple years ago).

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Wow thanks for the feedback @Bernadette and @Rosie especially with the natural fiber stuff which is what I’m looking at. I specifically want some short sleeve cardigans and sweaters due to living on the surface of the sun but having to have covered shoulders for clinicals, and Quince is one of the few places with a lot of options for those things! I have like 20 things in my cart right now lol, so I will report back on what I end up keeping. I have an electric sweater shaver already so a little pilling doesn’t bother me as long as it’s not over the top

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I have been given a nice cropped red activewear jacket. What do I wear this on top of?

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My absolutely favorite sweater is an Everlane sweater that is 50% recycled cashmere and 50% wool, and it is so soft and so thick and nicely made.

I paid a couple of bucks for it at the thrift store and didn’t realize it was a fancy brand.

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I bought 2 of the $50 cashmere sweaters a year and a half ago and I love them! I’ve had very little pilling, but I’ve only washed then each twice. I wear undershirts to avoid needing to wash them.

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