Oh yeah, I looooved my blow up doughnut pillow, and agree it had nothing to do with tears and everything to do with, well, everything else. I didn’t do much massage or anything and mine healed up fine.
I also didn’t use a squirt bottle because they aren’t a thing here, but I plan on giving one this special function after next labour.
Oh and mine prodded me to show me where to push which helped so much. Getting through it slowly and steady seems to be very helpful if your body allows that.
I’m using the Ovia pregnancy app because it has the least creepy pictures of baby. It has an option to put in pregnancy conditions/ complications. So I added my hyperemesis. This has no effect on the information it provides? It’s telling me to do all the things a “normal” pregnant person would use as good advice but are totally inappropriate or just plain impossible, like vegetables or yoga.
Yeah it does nothing 
unless you report mood changes or high blood pressure, and that’s still just like “talk to your doctor!” It’s not the most… robust app I feel like lol.
Ahahahahaha I’d forgotten about that aspect of pregnancy apps.
I found with my pregnancy app, and now with my period tracker app, there’s zero point to inputting data other than the key stuff (for pregnancy, due date, for period tracker, putting in the actual date your period starts so it can adjust its predictions). I assume they’re just collecting the other data and making money off it… somehow.
They are! At least, they are if you’re part of any of these apps as part of an employer wellness incentive. I read a whole article about it at one point, I need to find that again. But it included menstrual tracker type apps. It was super weird.
I will allow it to collect my data for now because it’s the only thing reminding me to take my thyroid medication at the moment. Thankfully it has nothing to do with my employer.
My favorite thing about these apps is that no one has updated them for a worldwide pandemic. The 2nd/3rd trimester tips are all still: book a massage! Go on a hospital tour!
…uh…sure…I’ll get right on that 
No other possible reaction.
Last month, Mr. Fern had a really good chat with CEO about family leave. Yesterday he had a chat with HR person about the details. They tried to say that if was on leave then the usual company-wide Christmas-to-New Years week off might not apply and he would have to take it as vacation time. It became very clear that he might be the first dad to actually take his full federally mandated leave, not just the industry standard of 2 weeks. HR person said, “Well, you know, most fathers take this time to welcome the baby.” His response was basically [more politely], “Sure I will be waving hello to this baby, but I will also be ‘welcoming’ it by doing dishes and cooking and feeding so my wife can recover from trauma.” 
He will probably be able to wrangle what he wants, but times like this I am extra grateful we are both relatively valued by our employers due to combination of privilege/hustle/delayingkidstilold. And that the emergency fund is padded.
My company has something similar…in order to take the winter week off, I have to be back at work for at least 1 day before/5 days after the holiday. It’s not written anywhere but the new head of HR won’t let people use vacation days to cover it. Luckily I think my boss will let me send a few emails and call it good so I’m technically being compliant.
Copious quantities of saliva. Gross and makes it hard to eat.
Lettuce smells really bad. Ponder tried to tell me it has no smell and he is wrong.
All lettuce, or certain kinds of lettuce? Because romaine smells awful.
I have found that my sense of smell is a million times stronger while pregnant. Mr E says it is a superpower because he won’t smell anything at all. I read that it is a biological thing from back in the day so pregnant women wouldn’t eat things that were starting to go bad and would make them sick.
I also have the strangest food aversion to chicken from Chipotle. I can’t even walk by the restaurant because if I get a whiff of it I will immediately throw up, even in the 2nd and 3rd trimesters. Even thinking about it now is making my stomach queasy. I have no idea what it is about that particular smell but it is terrible for me.
Lettuce was one of my major enemies during pregnancy. It even took me a couple months after birth before I was willing to give it a try. 
I knew I was right and I totally appreciate the extra validation. It was bog standard iceberg lettuce. He’s now banned from bringing it near me.
Tonight was the first of 3 online birthing classes. The instructor was very good. Bodies are craaaaayyyy.
There are some incredible things the body does, eh? I found it interesting what I actually remembered during labour and what I totally forgot.
Nice! We’re doing our first class this weekend, but it’s only 3 hours on birth and then the other classes are on other topics. I’m hoping that will be plenty as we have also hired a doula and will be meeting with her for several hours before birth (whether or not she’s actually able to come to the hospital, which I’m guess she won’t be).
I somehow completely dismissed any information about delivering the placenta and was not pleased when it came that time