Older Life Wisdom - Middle Age and Beyond!

Looking back at 43, and still seeming to have everything attached and working reasonably well, some of my previous concerns seemed a bit silly.

At 27, tears developed in both of my retinas, and I worried about going blind.
At 30, hip bursitis gave me a limp for a couple months. And my shoulders ached. And my knees…

But I got into sports in my 30s, increased my cardio and weight-lifting, and got in much better shape.

My 20s were full of insecurities and trying to get attention and feel important and noticed and attractive. This bled into my early 30s, but I started to realize I didn’t get what I hoped out of those things. There were a lot of shallow relationships that were not fulfilling.

Started dating MvR just before my 35th birthday. You could say my social life has changed a bit. From almost constant partying, going out to bars, seeing friends, etc. to being quite the homebody. The extrovert in me still misses some of these things sometimes.

My concern over hair and always wearing contacts to look my “best” has largely fallen to the wayside. (Not entirely, I’m not a barbarian!)

Of course, now I’ve had a second concussion and I don’t think I can type much more here for now so I’ll end it abruptly :sweat_smile:

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Just want to say that this seems like deep insight into humanity/generations in general?

Like whatever generation is in their teens/20s is always disparaged like “oh they don’t wanna work lazy bums want everything on a silver platter” but really it’s a phase most people go through in some sense (ie seeking greatness whether it’s pursuing schooling or trying to land a “dream job” or partying and showing off socially or some combo)

Anyway around the 30yo mark that seems to taper off and we (in general) recognize that everything is work and greatness is more work and having drifted away from early life relationships start to value life metrics, deep friendships etc?

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I agree, but I also think that part of this is that in my 20s I was still pretty focused on those people physically nearby.

This may not be true still with the ‘net, but a lot of my letting go of “give a damn” about others’ opinions went – when I realized how BIG the world was.

I wasn’t stuck with the people I’d always known/situations I’d always known. I could chose, or not, to associate with those people. To go to those places. To aspire to those standards. I had control.

As I internalized that I didn’t have to adopt the standards put out there by my birth family/locale/social standing/employment, I stopped worrying so much about their opinions and became a lot more secure. I could walk away from the never enough: religion, money, social standing, premium stuff, factoids stuffed into my head and replace it with the spirituality, having enough, people I actually cherished, and not play the “data regurgitation” game my academic family seems to love.

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My oldest son is 49 and took me out for lunch today. He was saying that he read that he’s old enough to get a colonoscopy. I told him it appears that we will be seniors together if I live long enough since we are only 19 years apart. He was unamused:)).

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I had a mom and son patient combo at a long term care place when I was a nursing student :sweat_smile:

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I read a story in a magazine where a 80 year old man told the workers his dad was coming to visit. Of course they didn’t believe him. When the weekend came his healthy 98 year old dad came to visit.

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On my way to visit a 94 year old man who until 3 weeks ago was living very independently and 2 of his kids are seniors

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Saw this poem today and thought of this thread:

https://www.instagram.com/p/CjRpOBcMsSL

(y u no preview?)

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